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Rant O' the Day!

RANT

So, I guess one of the things that’s bothering me about this whole Kavanaugh horse and pony show is that I’ve been fending off sexual advances my entire life—well. Until I got too old to be a sex object.

I never thought of them as “assaults.”

I thought, There are a lot of assholes in this world. Take steps to avoid those assholes.

I started taking Tai Kwon Do! I got two-thirds of the way to a black belt before the birth of my first son cut into the time I had available for such endeavors.

The incidents were upsetting, yes, but I never felt derailed by them or traumatized in any ongoing sense. I sure didn’t feel like a victim.

So, is something wrong with me because I didn’t feel like a victim?

###

Also, I can’t quite get it out of my head that this is a class issue in the most privileged, namby-pamby nation on the face of the planet. The age of consent in Mexico is twelve. Congo militias are weaponizing rape, and forcing women to squat on hot coals afterwards to prevent conception. Acid attacks in India. Child marriage in Pakistan. Machismo in all its permutations and combinations throughout Central and South America.

One notes, too, that except for the accusations against Russell Simmons, the #MeToo movement has been conspicuously silent about male-on-female violence in the African American community.

So, I’m mildly disgusted by all these fragile, entitled women on American social media wailing, And then he brushed his hand against my nipple! And I did-ent like it!

And I’m even more disgusted with the dopey guys who white-knight them. Particularly because—since my FB friend list is kind of a sagittal slice through my past—I know, sometimes from personal experience, what absolute d-a-w-g-s many of these guys were back in the day.

I do think it’s wrong for me to feel disgusted. I get it: Any cleanup campaign begins by picking up your own backyard.

But, you know. You feel what you feel.

###

I don't think it's wrong to feel the deepest contempt for the social media lynching of Brett Kavanaugh.

Too bad for him that he’s the poster boy for White Privilege! (Well. Not really. ‘Cause he’s a Catholic. But close enough for government work.) I don’t like the guy, but no one should be subjected to this type of public humiliation.

Everyone is entitled to due process. Everyone.

It’s just amazing for me to watch this mob that howls for “justice” when one of its own tribe members is on the chopping block unleash this tsunami of self-righteous cant punctuated by asinine, elementary school jokes. Plus that never-ending streams of Big Reveals! But, of course, the reason people flock to social media is to sniff each others' butts. Good times are had by all!

If these people were really interested in changing the rules of the game, they would get up off their asses, turn off their computers, and begin canvassing and campaigning for female political candidates. Women currently comprise a mere 20% of the voting members of Congress (84 Congressional representatives; 23 Senators.) If these people really cared, they would begin educating themselves about what’s going on in the rest of the world and try to do something about it.

But they’re sheep.

Being manipulated by the media.

Which has figured out that political soap opera gets higher ratings than scripted drama and is so-o-o-o much cheaper to produce.

And they're having so much fun playing, No!-I'm-the-Bigger-Victim! on social media.

/RANT

This entry was originally posted at http://mallorys-camera.dreamwidth.org. You may leave comments on either Dreamwidth or LiveJournal if you like.

Comments

( 22 comments — Leave a comment )
lifeinroseland
Sep. 29th, 2018 03:54 pm (UTC)
The Young and Kavanaugh.

I am having a little difficulty trying to feel like a victim, as well. The word assault needs to retain its meaning, please. Men tell me things on the street and I am told that is “verbal rape.” That was meant as a joke, and it made me laugh.

I’m even starting to feel alienated from some of my intelligent, splendid girlfriends. Who cares about the truth? Whose side are you on?

Before Hillary Lost, as a headline informed me the morning after the election, I made an optipessimist joke to someone I trust, Bitches Take Over, Turns Out It’s Worse. I’m curious about the book The Power, dealing with the subject, by Naomi Alderman.
mallorys_camera
Sep. 29th, 2018 04:02 pm (UTC)
A 1,000% YES to what you've written there!

I could rant for another 10,000 words on this one.

Don't worry! I won't. :-)
lifeinroseland
Sep. 29th, 2018 04:19 pm (UTC)
Rant away, but disable comments.

Articulation of the truth, even if it’s in a little corner, is what’s needed amid so much hypocrisy.

But I get it.
bandicoot
Sep. 29th, 2018 04:45 pm (UTC)
I don't see female politicians as any kind of an answer. Female doesn't automatically equate to better. Our congresscreature is Anna Eshoo, an ass if there ever was one. In your old area, Anna Cabelero(?) is just one more lying professional career politician, going from one term-limited place at the trough to another. We just need better people, but what better person would want to put up with the crap that gets thrown at politicians these days?
mallorys_camera
Sep. 29th, 2018 04:49 pm (UTC)
So do you believe there are no productive avenues for change?
bandicoot
Sep. 29th, 2018 05:02 pm (UTC)
Honestly? I don't have a lot of hope. It would take better people, and the ones that would put themselves through the wringer to serve in political office seem to be in short supply.
millysdaughter
Oct. 1st, 2018 01:22 am (UTC)
it will require drafting the congress -- all men are currently registered, and it would not take too much to get women registered
mallorys_camera
Oct. 1st, 2018 09:03 am (UTC)
When you say "draft," are you talking about a military draft?
millysdaughter
Oct. 2nd, 2018 02:26 am (UTC)
Yes -- they could draft congressmen by the same random lottery they used for drafting the US military for so very many years. We would get actual representative government, instead of billionaire career politicians!
livejournal
Sep. 29th, 2018 05:30 pm (UTC)
Hello! Your entry got to top-25 of the most popular entries in LiveJournal!
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mallorys_camera
Sep. 29th, 2018 05:35 pm (UTC)
Putinbots are having a slow day.
ahunter3
Sep. 29th, 2018 07:38 pm (UTC)
I really hate the "starving children in china" response to anyone who dares to complain about anything. Yeah, someone somewhere else had it worse, and yeah maybe you yourself dealt with that kind of thing as just one more thing you have to deal with in everyday life (like the rain, or the awful traffic on your commute or something).

That doesn't mean everyone should just STFU and cease to complain about it. It really doesn't.
mallorys_camera
Sep. 29th, 2018 08:37 pm (UTC)
i really hate “the starving children in china”

Hardly surprising. Petulance IS one of the defining characteristics of privilege.

Edited at 2018-09-30 01:28 am (UTC)
lacachet
Sep. 29th, 2018 09:40 pm (UTC)
Okay--I had to look up sagittal
mallorys_camera
Sep. 30th, 2018 01:27 am (UTC)
Ha, ha! :-)
signorinakatina
Sep. 30th, 2018 03:17 am (UTC)
I've also noticed the Big Reveal trend. It's mystifying but I can also relate. And I have been phone canvassing myself! So far, all for women! It's the only thing that makes me feel like I'm helping. :(

As for Kavanaugh--I don't want him to get the job. I went into this feeling pretty neutral about him, but after seeing how he behaved I think he should be disqualified.

Their stories are not reconcilable and so you kind of have to choose. I believe her, but I also know I was predisposed to believe her. To me she just seems so much more credible.

If this is part of a pattern of alcoholism and sexual assault, I think it's important to take it seriously. And it seems like it is part of a pattern, although I hope an FBI investigation uncovers more facts. In any case, rapist or no, after his terrible demeanor the other day, I wouldn't want him representing our country.

On the other hand, some of it did seem at least a little irrelevant. There is nothing wrong with having a consensual threesome, in high school or anytime. He said Devil's Triangle was a drinking game but others are saying it was a threesome, as if that kind of sexual experience would make him more guilty. The LYING under oath would be the problem here, but who cares if he had a threesome?? Why do we need to go that far into his private life? (even if he did put it in his yearbook for the world/his school to see?) I do think he lied under oath, and lied a lot. That is my gut feeling. If he did (and what do I know?), then that is a big problem for a person trying to represent our justice system.

I feel like we are drawing boundaries in real time and both people, now known public figures, are being sacrificed as society decides how to handle this situation.

ultimately I feel like it IS a big problem in our society. As long so many women (and also men) are raped, we will all be struggling with rape culture.

Edited at 2018-09-30 03:21 am (UTC)
mallorys_camera
Sep. 30th, 2018 12:39 pm (UTC)
I think we agree on the essential stuff. :-)

(I would bet that Kavanaugh's post-Ford performance was coached. And all I can think about that was: Really? The Republicans thought that would sell it?)
signorinakatina
Sep. 30th, 2018 09:49 pm (UTC)
hahaha!
millysdaughter
Oct. 1st, 2018 01:20 am (UTC)
My take:
if aa awkward / bad pass now carries the same stigma, and the same accusations, and the same penalties as actual rape....go for it!
If you're going to do the time anyway...enjoy the crime!!!
mallorys_camera
Oct. 1st, 2018 09:06 am (UTC)
That's pretty hilarious. :-)

I wonder how many men might actually start thinking that way.
zyzyly
Oct. 1st, 2018 01:22 am (UTC)
I sure wish we lived in the same town so we could meet and have a cup of coffee and talk about this whole Kavanaugh thing, as well as all sorts of other things. You have such an interesting perspective, and I would welcome the opportunity for a conversation.
mallorys_camera
Oct. 1st, 2018 09:05 am (UTC)
Definitely. You're one of my favorite LJ posters. You have such a droll, mellow take on the world. And you're an amazing photographer.
( 22 comments — Leave a comment )